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Help! My Mother is Driving Me Crazy!

How to self-manage at the peak of frustration while caregiving.

Although I often feel guilty about reaching this point, I know that we all do as


This role is demanding.

This role is emotionally and physically draining.

This role requires around-the-clock care.

This role is important.

This role is life-critical.

This role is a privilege and an honor.

But it is HARD.

And this is my cry for help.

Before my frustration and anger get out of control in ways I will regret, I ’m taking this as a signal to take an immediate break!

I believe all caregivers will experience this heightened frustration at some point in their journey. And when you do, please be sure to do this. Pay close attention to your feelings rather than feeling guilty about experiencing them.

I’ve learned that these “boiling points” are signals for the inner emotional work we need to do for our own benefit. This emotional work will allow us to consistently show up and be present in the lives of our loved ones.

Here’s my prescription for how to handle anxiety, frustration, or even mild depression

at the moment it inevitably arrives.

Take a Time Out

Whenever I ’m frustrated, I tend to step back and allow myself some alone time

whenever I can. It can be something as simple as a walk around the block, a short

drive, a walk in a park, a class, or a quick retreat to my room for fifteen minutes of


What it does for me:

Having my own time and space to do as I wish without my mother’s needs invading

my space creates a boundary of sorts. A time when I can call the shots without any

interference, clear my mind and gain perspective in my life. This time creates a few

moments of peace, renews my mental and emotional energy, and allows me to

emerge with a clear, alert mind. This eradicates any sense of burnout or resentment

that could possibly interfere with our relationship. As a result, I have declared my

room as the “leave me alone” zone.

Recharge Your Batt